So I'm tired. I still haven't finished all the homework I was supposed to do this weekend, but I will get around to it... eventually! My legs hurt from being on my feet all damn day at work. Gotta keep chasin that paypah! A song that seems to be glued into my brain is "Mad" by NeYo. Its a really great song, come to think of it. Makes you stop and think, especially after watching the video. But yeah... time to get serious with my homework.... or I can just take a nap! Obviously, I'm going to do my homework! LOL
:)
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Friday, November 28, 2008
Grateful
So its Thanksgiving and I woke up today to a mass of texts from friends and family, wishing me "Happy" Thanksgiving. Although I have much to be grateful and thankful for, it still pains me to be spending this Holiday in the situation that I'm in. Basically, I need to find a place to stay ASAP. As the holidays come closer, I remain assured that I will not be spending time with family this season. I'm hella gonna miss seeing my nephew and sister this Christmas, but I know that I gotta stay in Hawaii to work, find a place and get myself solidly situated before the next semester. Anyway, I got an email from my mom today and it hella made me tear up. I miss being at home and bothering her about cooking thanksgiving lunch. I miss waking up and feeling secure and happy... like nothing could go wrong. It was just another reality check for me that I found really hard to take in. Ah well...
On another note, much thanks and a warm fa'afetai to Blake and his family for the AWESOME dinner. You really don't know how much it meant to be with people and around a family. It was a good feeling. Thanks to family business for showing up and being punks! LOL. Bhasie you suck at Rockband and don't ever take the mic again. Haha! Jk Bruh
Aight. Im gunna get back to watching these fools play rockband. Thank God none of them are famous. Hahaha
On another note, much thanks and a warm fa'afetai to Blake and his family for the AWESOME dinner. You really don't know how much it meant to be with people and around a family. It was a good feeling. Thanks to family business for showing up and being punks! LOL. Bhasie you suck at Rockband and don't ever take the mic again. Haha! Jk Bruh
Aight. Im gunna get back to watching these fools play rockband. Thank God none of them are famous. Hahaha
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Relieved.
This weekend was awesome! Again, awakening retreat came at the moment I needed it. Although it was filled with stressful, irritating, and OMG-MY-HEAD-IS-GOING-TO-EXPLODE moments, I had the PEOPLE I NEEDED there with me to cool me down and put me in the "P" zone LOL... my staff!! Yall are awesome! I'm glad I got to know some of the best crackheads in the world! :)
This weekend was stressful but it was also an eye-opening experience to how much prayer and the dependence on God can do for me. At almost every situation where I thought I would lose my cool, HE was there with me, and worked through my staff and friends, to help keep things in focus. With God as your eyes NOTHING is out of sight!
Finally, Im going to say this: I'm satisfied with the way I handled myself and I did what I did to get things DONE. I worked my ass off, especially at the last mintue and during hella stressful situations, I pulled through (due to the support of A LOT of unsung heroes). I'm the kind of leader that appreciates the FEEDBACK but I won't take the BULLSHIT. If you don't like the way I handle things, say it to my face. I might see it your way but chances are, I won't. I know when things are out of my hands and I've learned to give them up to God. I hope many of you out there learn to do the same.
But yeah... I think over this weekend I've probably had like, 7 hours of sleep. I've been cracked out on coffee, energy drinks, fruit roll ups and laughter. Its time to hibernate. LOL.
PEACE OUT
This weekend was stressful but it was also an eye-opening experience to how much prayer and the dependence on God can do for me. At almost every situation where I thought I would lose my cool, HE was there with me, and worked through my staff and friends, to help keep things in focus. With God as your eyes NOTHING is out of sight!
Finally, Im going to say this: I'm satisfied with the way I handled myself and I did what I did to get things DONE. I worked my ass off, especially at the last mintue and during hella stressful situations, I pulled through (due to the support of A LOT of unsung heroes). I'm the kind of leader that appreciates the FEEDBACK but I won't take the BULLSHIT. If you don't like the way I handle things, say it to my face. I might see it your way but chances are, I won't. I know when things are out of my hands and I've learned to give them up to God. I hope many of you out there learn to do the same.
But yeah... I think over this weekend I've probably had like, 7 hours of sleep. I've been cracked out on coffee, energy drinks, fruit roll ups and laughter. Its time to hibernate. LOL.
PEACE OUT
Friday, November 21, 2008
3LP.
i 3LP, yeah you know me! :)
Chaminade University's Semesterly Awakening Retreat #20 will be taking place this weekend! It will be the culmination of months of hard work, prayers and preparation. It will be my 5th Awakening (including my original... "#16: Got Faith?" woo hoo!) and with every time comes a new experience. Being on the leadership team on this awakening retreat really opened my eyes to all the planning that goes into it and what goes on 'behind the scenes.' Although there are several changes that will be taking place during this retreat, I remain excited and hopeful that everything will work out. Life has a funny way of doing things sometimes, and I know everything will turn out for the better. This has been a stressful ride for me, considering my many situations, but no matter what I may be feeling or thinking, the success of the retreat is always paramount in my priorities. It is worth all my stress and hard work if this retreat touches just ONE retreater... my work has been done. I ask you guys out there to please pray for the retreat, its success, and also in allowing God to work THROUGH US to touch the lives of the retreaters in attendance. This weekend is going to be amazing!
=]
Chaminade University's Semesterly Awakening Retreat #20 will be taking place this weekend! It will be the culmination of months of hard work, prayers and preparation. It will be my 5th Awakening (including my original... "#16: Got Faith?" woo hoo!) and with every time comes a new experience. Being on the leadership team on this awakening retreat really opened my eyes to all the planning that goes into it and what goes on 'behind the scenes.' Although there are several changes that will be taking place during this retreat, I remain excited and hopeful that everything will work out. Life has a funny way of doing things sometimes, and I know everything will turn out for the better. This has been a stressful ride for me, considering my many situations, but no matter what I may be feeling or thinking, the success of the retreat is always paramount in my priorities. It is worth all my stress and hard work if this retreat touches just ONE retreater... my work has been done. I ask you guys out there to please pray for the retreat, its success, and also in allowing God to work THROUGH US to touch the lives of the retreaters in attendance. This weekend is going to be amazing!
=]
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Collide.
Collide
E.W. Wendt
Hey there baby
Hey there lady
This one second we meet
This one moment we share
Our worlds collide
Our stars, they shine
Brightly together
Near you, im blind
As time slows
As the wind stops
And the sun cries
tear drops of rain
falling
falling
falling
on you
on me
In this one second
In this one moment
When our worlds collide
When our stars align
When will I see you again?
(c)2008
E.W. Wendt
Hey there baby
Hey there lady
This one second we meet
This one moment we share
Our worlds collide
Our stars, they shine
Brightly together
Near you, im blind
As time slows
As the wind stops
And the sun cries
tear drops of rain
falling
falling
falling
on you
on me
In this one second
In this one moment
When our worlds collide
When our stars align
When will I see you again?
(c)2008
Redundant.
If I loved you, you'd know
I wouldn't have any trouble
Trying to show
Just how much I love you,
you know.
I wouldn't have any trouble
Trying to show
Just how much I love you,
you know.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Strained.
Too much shit is happening and I have no time to deal with it. I hate this! I might be overstressing myself, but still, I hate working with people who have no sense of order and direction and who won't reflect the 110% effort that I put in! Fuck, I can do this shit all by myself, 'cause all they doing is slowing me down! EHHH!!
Friday, November 14, 2008
Feeling good.
So I'm feeling pretty good right now. Like, not indestructible good, but like... things are getting better kind of good. I have a family thats always been with me and loves me NO MATTER WHAT; I have friends who annoy the shit outta me sometimes, but who are there for me even if I ain't there for myself (sounds confusing, but whatever. lol); and I have a God who loves me unconditionally... who has blessed me with so much that I can't believe I never realized it before. Its true that its the small things that matter, and I thank Him for putting those small things into my life.
Moving on.... well, we all know and have people who walk in and out of our lives. Sometimes its hard to see them go, even when you know its your fault. However, if you realize your mistakes and you take the steps to apologize and rectify them, and those people still won't budge... well, you've gotta learn to let go, let God and move on. You've done the best you can and its all up to them. No hard feelings, but you don't have time for drama.
Lately I've been posting poetry and its safe to say to expect more. Sometimes random thoughts flood my mind and there ain't no way to get them out but to WRITE. What I write isn't really a reflection of personal experiences. Most of them are, but I take inspiration from everywhere, everything and everyone around me... so hey, if something I write turns out to be related and/or about you, no hard feelings. LOL
But yeah. Its the weekend! I paid my phone bill (thanks mom) so now I'm BROKE. I got a job now so I guess I'm good and heading in the right direction. If you can, hit up Cirque tonight... its gunna be my first night there but from what I heard, ITS HELLA CRACKIN! LOL.
peace.
Moving on.... well, we all know and have people who walk in and out of our lives. Sometimes its hard to see them go, even when you know its your fault. However, if you realize your mistakes and you take the steps to apologize and rectify them, and those people still won't budge... well, you've gotta learn to let go, let God and move on. You've done the best you can and its all up to them. No hard feelings, but you don't have time for drama.
Lately I've been posting poetry and its safe to say to expect more. Sometimes random thoughts flood my mind and there ain't no way to get them out but to WRITE. What I write isn't really a reflection of personal experiences. Most of them are, but I take inspiration from everywhere, everything and everyone around me... so hey, if something I write turns out to be related and/or about you, no hard feelings. LOL
But yeah. Its the weekend! I paid my phone bill (thanks mom) so now I'm BROKE. I got a job now so I guess I'm good and heading in the right direction. If you can, hit up Cirque tonight... its gunna be my first night there but from what I heard, ITS HELLA CRACKIN! LOL.
peace.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Saturdays.
*I was going through my old MySpace blogs and found this in the mess. Hella relates to how I feel right now...
Saturdays at Home
At home, Saturdays
are the best and
sometimes the worst
days of the week.
Usually I'd wake up
enticed by the smell
of early morning breakfast:
fresh, buttered bread,
hot brewed tea
and my favorite,
mom's koko alaisa (cocoa rice).
It was always mom
who woke up early,
every Saturday morning
to do laundry
to be dried by
the morning sun,
to cook breakfast
and read
her Saturday paper.
Sometimes,
when my siblings and I
didn't get up early enough,
we'd awake to my mom's scolding:
"Get up!
get up!
Moe umi so'o!
Wake up
and do
your chores!"
Immediately
after breakfast
fe'au (chores)
after fe'au
after fe'au
after fe'au
would follow,
which is why I
detested Saturdays.
Saturdays were made
for chores,
my parents would say
and every Saturday
they stayed true
to their word.
After the
morning fe'au,
afternoon fe'au
and (insert small rest period)
evening fe'au,
we would shower
and later,
overlook the day's work
while the sun set
in the west;
a cool evening breeze
to herald the
moon, stars and night.
Saturday Evening Lotu (prayer)
was important
mom said,
like every Lotu
of every evening
of every day
of every week;
Lotu was family time,
but most importantly
dad said,
it was
family time with God.
Saturday dinners
were flexible
because my parents,
exhausted from the
day's fe'au
(and from scolding us
for being too lazy to do our fe'au),
usually took us driving
around the island
and stop at a store
to buy some snacks to eat.
Later my parents
would retire,
but before sleeping
mom would say,
"Sleep early
to wake up early
and cook Sunday To'ana'i (lunch)
before leaving
for church.
Vaai i le mea e tupu
i le tama'ititi pe a le
vave ala i luga,"
She would warn.
"Good night mom
we love you,"
my siblings and I
would say (smiling, of course)
before turning on
the T.V.
to watch movies
and play games
and stay up late
exactly as my mom
told us not to do.
Like always
we'd wake up late
on Sunday Morning,
but that's a whole different story.
I'd give anything
to fall asleep on a
Friday night in Oahu,
and wake up
at home
on Saturday morning,
to the enticing smell
of mom's breakfast
and to hear her scolding us
from the kitchen,
like the beginning of
every Saturday at home.
Saturdays at Home
At home, Saturdays
are the best and
sometimes the worst
days of the week.
Usually I'd wake up
enticed by the smell
of early morning breakfast:
fresh, buttered bread,
hot brewed tea
and my favorite,
mom's koko alaisa (cocoa rice).
It was always mom
who woke up early,
every Saturday morning
to do laundry
to be dried by
the morning sun,
to cook breakfast
and read
her Saturday paper.
Sometimes,
when my siblings and I
didn't get up early enough,
we'd awake to my mom's scolding:
"Get up!
get up!
Moe umi so'o!
Wake up
and do
your chores!"
Immediately
after breakfast
fe'au (chores)
after fe'au
after fe'au
after fe'au
would follow,
which is why I
detested Saturdays.
Saturdays were made
for chores,
my parents would say
and every Saturday
they stayed true
to their word.
After the
morning fe'au,
afternoon fe'au
and (insert small rest period)
evening fe'au,
we would shower
and later,
overlook the day's work
while the sun set
in the west;
a cool evening breeze
to herald the
moon, stars and night.
Saturday Evening Lotu (prayer)
was important
mom said,
like every Lotu
of every evening
of every day
of every week;
Lotu was family time,
but most importantly
dad said,
it was
family time with God.
Saturday dinners
were flexible
because my parents,
exhausted from the
day's fe'au
(and from scolding us
for being too lazy to do our fe'au),
usually took us driving
around the island
and stop at a store
to buy some snacks to eat.
Later my parents
would retire,
but before sleeping
mom would say,
"Sleep early
to wake up early
and cook Sunday To'ana'i (lunch)
before leaving
for church.
Vaai i le mea e tupu
i le tama'ititi pe a le
vave ala i luga,"
She would warn.
"Good night mom
we love you,"
my siblings and I
would say (smiling, of course)
before turning on
the T.V.
to watch movies
and play games
and stay up late
exactly as my mom
told us not to do.
Like always
we'd wake up late
on Sunday Morning,
but that's a whole different story.
I'd give anything
to fall asleep on a
Friday night in Oahu,
and wake up
at home
on Saturday morning,
to the enticing smell
of mom's breakfast
and to hear her scolding us
from the kitchen,
like the beginning of
every Saturday at home.
Hired!
Basically the headline says it all! I finally caught a break and things look like they're going to be great after all. Its amazing how, at the moment you seem to have lost all hope, and when you least expect it, God moves into your life and gives you what you need WHEN you need it. Praise be to Him! Much gratitude to my bruh Anthony for putting in a good word for me. You really don't know how much I appreciate this (well, maybe you do because I told you like, several times before lol)!! Also, a heartfelt fa'afetai and mahalo to all the people who had my back and who supported me through this time of trial and difficulty. And although the hardships may not be over, I can definitely say I can see the sunshine breaking through the clouds! :)
Monday, November 10, 2008
Other Guy.
A little something inspired by all the men who've been in the "other guy" situation. Hope it all works out! Sucks to be you and in love... lol. Just kidding :)
Other Guy
I’ve given you my heart
But you’re tearing it in two
And I’m doing all I can
To understand what you’re going through
My pride is telling me to leave
But I know its too damn late
Girl, you’re the one I love
I know that’s no mistake.
You said it ain’t a thing
That this problem will go away
You said I’m the one you want
And you keep telling me to stay.
Then tell me why I feel this way
That I shouldn’t even try
Because no matter what I do or say
I’ll still just be the other guy.
My homies told me to keep my distance,
That you weren’t worth the risk
But my heart was already yours
From the moment we first kissed.
I can’t stop thinking about you
Even if it won’t do me any good
Because while you occupy my mind
Your heart still lingers with the other dude.
You said it ain’t a thing
That I’m the guy you want
You said he’s just a minor problem
That you just can’t confront.
Then tell me why I feel this way
That I shouldn’t even try
Because no matter what I do or say
I’ll still just be the other guy.
When I hold your hands or kiss your lips
Or look into your eyes
I’m hoping that there is some truth
Behind this curtain of lies.
Sometimes I wish I didn’t feel this way
That I could stop loving you so much
But I know that without you with me
I’d be a lame man without his crutch.
You said it ain’t a thing
That you need me more than ever
You said that you’ll get over him
And that we’ll always be together.
Then tell me why I feel this way
That I shouldn’t even try
Because no matter what I do or say
I’ll still just be the other guy.
I’m hoping one day you’ll realize
Just how much I’ve given up
For the love I have for you
I just can’t get enough.
But until the day comes
That you’ll be all mine
I’ll always be here for you
Waiting to be your only guy.
(c)2008 E.W. Wendt
Other Guy
I’ve given you my heart
But you’re tearing it in two
And I’m doing all I can
To understand what you’re going through
My pride is telling me to leave
But I know its too damn late
Girl, you’re the one I love
I know that’s no mistake.
You said it ain’t a thing
That this problem will go away
You said I’m the one you want
And you keep telling me to stay.
Then tell me why I feel this way
That I shouldn’t even try
Because no matter what I do or say
I’ll still just be the other guy.
My homies told me to keep my distance,
That you weren’t worth the risk
But my heart was already yours
From the moment we first kissed.
I can’t stop thinking about you
Even if it won’t do me any good
Because while you occupy my mind
Your heart still lingers with the other dude.
You said it ain’t a thing
That I’m the guy you want
You said he’s just a minor problem
That you just can’t confront.
Then tell me why I feel this way
That I shouldn’t even try
Because no matter what I do or say
I’ll still just be the other guy.
When I hold your hands or kiss your lips
Or look into your eyes
I’m hoping that there is some truth
Behind this curtain of lies.
Sometimes I wish I didn’t feel this way
That I could stop loving you so much
But I know that without you with me
I’d be a lame man without his crutch.
You said it ain’t a thing
That you need me more than ever
You said that you’ll get over him
And that we’ll always be together.
Then tell me why I feel this way
That I shouldn’t even try
Because no matter what I do or say
I’ll still just be the other guy.
I’m hoping one day you’ll realize
Just how much I’ve given up
For the love I have for you
I just can’t get enough.
But until the day comes
That you’ll be all mine
I’ll always be here for you
Waiting to be your only guy.
(c)2008 E.W. Wendt
Stay.
The weekend was okay. Mostly slept, went to a birthday party (Ups to Family Business & Young Padawan the Birthday Boyy), had an argument & a "falling out" with others, acted a little crazy, went to Church, sang in the choir and ate some nachos.
Now its on to the new week :)
Now its on to the new week :)
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Presidential!
BARACK OBAMA WAS ELECTED AS THE 44TH PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!
Today, history was made, and I'm grateful and happy to have been a part of it (although I had to skip a class today lol). Today I witnessed the rise of a great man to the highest seat of authority in our country. He represents the change we need to move our people and our nation forward and to make a positive impact in our world. I believe America put the right man in office, and I know he will do an awesome job! I mean, did you hear his speech?! Obama is an inspiring and eloquent leader who will move our country forward.
YES, WE CAN!!
Monday, November 3, 2008
Updates.
Sorry I haven't been posting much, but here goes the recent updates...
Halloween was awesome! I took time out to finally go see my family out in Kapolei on Friday, and I took my little cousins trick-or-treating and surprisingly, it was great! It was kind of a break from the same old "walk-and-get-drunk-at-the-waikiki-strip" deal and I got loads of candy :) It felt good to be with family and just be a kid again! No, I didn't dress up but I got candy anyway.... I was the biggest "kid" on the block (if you don't count the other Samoan fa'akamakamas out there! LOL). Saturday, me and the family drove out to Hawaii Kai to have fun at the beach and ride their jet skii... man was that AWESOME! I fell off a couple of times (it hurt a little but it was fun! haha!) and I finally got the hang of it, and when they let me drive that thing.... I was a monster! haha! I almost hit a buoy but luckily I didn't ram any divers over or anything..haha! It was a good day with great people and lots of food :D Sunday was alright... I had breakfast with the family and then I had to leave early so I could make it on time for my AR Heads Meeting (commitment and responsibility! haha!) Overall, it was a great and much needed break from all the business I'm usually around and all the shit I have to deal with.
On another note, I'm still keeping positive despite the refusal of fate to work in my favor. But I'm not backing down. Hopefully my persistence will begin to persevere, for now, think of me when you pray :)
Also, with all the relationships budding everywhere, some have asked me (how dare they!? lol) if I was going to be in a "romantic" relationship soon. My answer to that is... hell no! I am not in a time, place or moment in my life where I think I could handle any "romantic" relationship. I'm a man of priorities, and "romantic" relationships/love just doesn't make the cut. At least not now anyway. I mean, I'm at the point in life where I'm concentrated on my success, and I just don't have room for any lovey-dovey shit. I am not about to jump into something where the girl and I would eventually end up getting hurt (more her than me lol), and I am not about to put some girl in that position. I refuse to be the cause of your bitterness! LOL! But yeah, at least I'm man enough to admit that I am not ready for any kind of commitment, unless it deals with my personal development. When will I be ready for a steady relationship? Maybe after Law School when I am ready to support her ass... haha! jk :)
I think thats all for now. I didn't do any kind of homework this weekend, so I'm hoping there won't be any unpleasant academic surprises tomorrow... haha!
PEACE.
Halloween was awesome! I took time out to finally go see my family out in Kapolei on Friday, and I took my little cousins trick-or-treating and surprisingly, it was great! It was kind of a break from the same old "walk-and-get-drunk-at-the-waikiki-strip" deal and I got loads of candy :) It felt good to be with family and just be a kid again! No, I didn't dress up but I got candy anyway.... I was the biggest "kid" on the block (if you don't count the other Samoan fa'akamakamas out there! LOL). Saturday, me and the family drove out to Hawaii Kai to have fun at the beach and ride their jet skii... man was that AWESOME! I fell off a couple of times (it hurt a little but it was fun! haha!) and I finally got the hang of it, and when they let me drive that thing.... I was a monster! haha! I almost hit a buoy but luckily I didn't ram any divers over or anything..haha! It was a good day with great people and lots of food :D Sunday was alright... I had breakfast with the family and then I had to leave early so I could make it on time for my AR Heads Meeting (commitment and responsibility! haha!) Overall, it was a great and much needed break from all the business I'm usually around and all the shit I have to deal with.
On another note, I'm still keeping positive despite the refusal of fate to work in my favor. But I'm not backing down. Hopefully my persistence will begin to persevere, for now, think of me when you pray :)
Also, with all the relationships budding everywhere, some have asked me (how dare they!? lol) if I was going to be in a "romantic" relationship soon. My answer to that is... hell no! I am not in a time, place or moment in my life where I think I could handle any "romantic" relationship. I'm a man of priorities, and "romantic" relationships/love just doesn't make the cut. At least not now anyway. I mean, I'm at the point in life where I'm concentrated on my success, and I just don't have room for any lovey-dovey shit. I am not about to jump into something where the girl and I would eventually end up getting hurt (more her than me lol), and I am not about to put some girl in that position. I refuse to be the cause of your bitterness! LOL! But yeah, at least I'm man enough to admit that I am not ready for any kind of commitment, unless it deals with my personal development. When will I be ready for a steady relationship? Maybe after Law School when I am ready to support her ass... haha! jk :)
I think thats all for now. I didn't do any kind of homework this weekend, so I'm hoping there won't be any unpleasant academic surprises tomorrow... haha!
PEACE.
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